One of my favorite personal development books is Wayne Dyer’s “You’ll See It When You Believe It.” I know Dr. Dyer is not the originator of most of his ideas, it’s why I don’t mind re-hashing them here. I’ve heard it said that Hemingway is quoted,”Amateurs borrow, Artists steal.” So I am jacking all my favorite “guru’s” material wholesale. But it’ll be filtered through the Buddy Show.
Have-Do-Be
Back to Dr Dyer (and I’ve heard T. Harv Ecker use these examples as well). When we are wanting something, whether it is material gain, better relationships, spiritual understanding, etc, most of us operate under the concept of Have, Be, Do. This is most people’s life experience. They think,”When I have this, I’ll do that, and then I’ll be this.” Once I finally get that lover, I’ll be fulfilled, and then I’ll be a happier person. Once I finally make $40,000 a month as an internet marketer, then I won’t have money worries, then I will be fulfilled. You follow the pattern, I’m sure. And we all tend to think like this. So we’re looking for the final outcome but are stopped from getting it because we can’t get through the first two steps. And notice that the final outcome almost always similar. We want fulfillment, we want happiness. Of course then we need to drill down and figure out just what those things mean to us.
Be-Do-Have
This is Dyer’s idea of “You See It When You Believe It.” This is where we say to ourselves, “I need to be, to develop myself into the type of person who will do whatever it takes to have what I want. And please don’t limit this to material things. Let’s say you want to move to a cave in the Himalayas and be a monk. You have to put yourself into that mindset. I mean the idea of traveling to India or Nepal and living in an isolated place with few creature comforts…takes a strong person. That’s not giving up on life, it’s embracing it to the fullest!
Having comes after doing, right? So how can it be that we normally put having at the beginning? If we have to have something before we can be and do, then we are setting ourselves up to fail. So, why don’t we do the things that are required for our success? Because of fear. Sometimes we’re just afraid of “what if…” What if I suck? What I fail? Or worse (and this is a big one for me) what if I win? “What if” is a dead end game. What if cows fly? See how ridiculous that is? Why do we invest fear in something that does not exist? Why is it that we can take two people with exactly the same resources and one of them “thrives while the other just stives or dies”, to quote Harv Ecker.
It is my inner world that creates my outer world
A well used phrase to be sure. But it’s true, you can’t find inner peqce outside yourself. Again to quote Harv Ecker (and he got it from someone else, no doubt)- You can’t enjoy the fruits of your life without paying greater attention to the roots of your life.
When you come upon some struggle in your endeavors what happens in your mind? What kind of internal chatter starts up? How often is this chatter negative and non-supportive to getting the job done? Who is this non-supportive chattering person? If it’s you (and it is) who is the one taking issue and asking about it? Well, that’s you too. So are there two yous?
